Writing as hell with no sleep and too much coffee. Soon I have a book. A book of feelings and no filter. A book that tells the truth, dark as light. Like beauty and beast.
Some days it feels like I’m the worst person on this planet. It fills my heart with hate and anger. If I’m not kind to myself, I’m easy to attack someone who comes too close to my heart. As if my vulnerability needs protection or something. Some days I love myself and everyone I meet unconditionally. I see the beauty of me and everyone else. I have easy for laughter and feel happy for no reason at all.
The last two years of my life have been intense. A beautiful time. Full of happiness, love, beauty and pain. I have learned a lot. Pain and love. Happiness and sorrow.
I learned to fully open my heart and love a person as hard as I did not think was possible.
I learned to dare to trust a person without trust.
I learned how painful it feels to be the one who hurts another when I choose my truth.
I learned how it really feels to be heartbreaked and keep myself through a pain I have never experienced.
I learned to stay when my living love needed to explore his life, even if it hurts like hell.
I have learned how beautiful a relationship can be when we both can cry in each other’s arms for hours and then laugh at how we hurt each other when all we wanted was to be loved.
I learned how to set limits before it is to late.
Now I learn how I love with an open heart even though I feel scared.
Now I’m learning how to let go of what’s been and watching what is now.
Now I learn to be soft and loving in a tough world.
I learn a lot. I’m thankful. I love my trip.
I learn to stay soft and open without stepping on my own limits.
I’m not there yet, but I practice daily. And I’m ready to be a bigger person than I was yesterday.
Thanks to you because you are a reflection of myself. So that I can grow.
Today’s poetry. No filter.